Paulelmo's Blog

A chance of clouds to my sunny disposition

My nature and my situation have combined to make me a fairly happy person; I don’t mean to say that I’m a falling all over like a giddy fool with an ice cream cone, a week’s vacation, and 11 months left on a year’s subscription to Playboy kind of happy, but I’m generally a glass half full kind of guy. Occasionally people will ask me why I’m so happy, and I’ll tell them it’s because I don’t expect too much out of life. I’m not trying to be glib; that’s just basically true.

I think I understand the grind of life. I rely on some central tenets. First, I know that my life can now be viewed as little more than a support system for the lives of my children. I can make decisions for myself and I’ve gained enough of a position in, and an insight to, life that the father I am has to stay focused on these two boys who have not progressed as such. Second, I am not looking for anything than the basic needs from my life. I look at Mazlow’s Hierarchy, and I’m pretty comfortable in all of it. In my drinking days, it was the inclusion needs that tripped me up, that feeling like I was worthwhile if I belonged. Gordon Allport’s thoughts on in group, out group, and reference group help me comprehend my neediness in those days and how not to regress back to that point. I know where I belong, I’m comfortable with it, and I don’t care to be accepted by just everybody.

Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs

All I want is all I need, and since I’ve got all I need, I don’t want anything I don’t have. I’m so pleased with myself for how well I stay focused on that these days. It helps me to remain almost constantly content with life and in a generally happy mood.

Still, if it being 23 degrees outside don’t chap your backside a bit, you and I will probably not be the best of friends today. I know there’s a need for it in the cycle of life that I don’t fully understand, but I still don’t think there’s any sense in it.

Stay warm, pretty people. We’ll talk soon.

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